Dear Diary
by blue sakuras
Summary: The real reason I am writing in this journal is because I think I will have a mental breakdown if I do not confide in someone soon. I had read in Glamour, that writing in down one's thoughts and emotions and feelings eases stress. InuxKag MirxSan SessxKag
1. Entry One

AN: I am experimenting with writing styles. This whole fanfic will be written in a journal format. It will be written as if it were Kagome's diary posted up onto the internet. (That would be sad if someone actually did that to someone else's diary. Invasion of privacy anyone?) Just to clear it up, this is an **alternate universe** fanfic.

_"...Something just isn't right  
I can feel it inside  
The truth isn't far behind me  
You can't deny  
  
When I turn the lights out  
When I close my eyes  
Reality overcomes me  
I'm living a lie  
  
When I'm alone I  
Feel so much better  
And when I'm around you  
I don't feel..."_ - **Avril Lavigne, Together**

Entry One

February 5th

Dear Diary,

_I just don't understand it. Inuyasha has just been drifting away from me. I don't get it. I have been nothing but supportive and encouraging wth him, letting him know I would never hate him, not** ever.** I am writing this all down, and although the book is rather cute and pink, I would rather be brooding on the bed in my room, listening to_ **Avril Lavigne**_. Her songs just really reflect how I feel. Sometimes, when I'm really feeling bad, listening to those lyrics make me cry. But that's okay. I really love music. It just feels so good to listen to a song and leave your life behind. People say that about books. But it's always been music that has taken away my worries and woes and all that shit everyone says reading does._

_The real reason I am writing in this journal is because I think I will have a mental breakdown if I do not confide in someone soon. I had read in _**Glamour**_, that writing in down one's thoughts and emotions and feelings eases stress. Well, the reason I think I may go insane is because Inuyasha's ex has returned from her two-year study abroad. It seems she had broken up with Inuyasha because she felt (and I can see the reasoning behind this) that his jealously and overpossessiveness would just further corrupt a long distance relationship. Thinking of this is causing m to become incredibly depressed. I shall continue tomorrow._


	2. Entry Two

AN: To answer any unanswered questions, yes, the fanfic will have very short chapters. But does anyone ever really have a five-page (when typed up) entry?

_"...See the thing about you, that caught my eye,  
Is the same thing that makes me change, my mind.  
Kinda hard to explain, but girl, I'll try.  
You need to sit down, this may take a while.  
You see, she sorta looks, just like you.  
She even smiles, just the way you do.  
So innocent, she seemed, but I was schooled  
I'm reminded when I look at you, but,  
  
You remind of a girl, that I once knew.  
See her face whenever I, I look at you.  
You won't believe all of the things that she put me through.  
This is why I just can't get with you..."_ - **U Remind Me, Usher**

Entry Two

February 6th

Dear Diary,

_I saw her today. But she didn't see me. I knew it was her the moment my eyes glanced over her. It is true, what everyone says. I truly do look like her twin. Our face, our body structure, our long black hair... We could have been entered in a twin contest and won. I am just very glad that my eyes are a azure blue while hers are just brown. Miroku had told me I looked strikingly similar. He was very **very** right. I called Inuyasha's cell phone this morning and left him a message to see if we were still spending Valentine's Day together. It is only nine days away, after all. Sango and Kagura have both called today._

_Sango called to tell me to forget about Inuyasha and dump him. She always says this. I just told her I loved him too much to leave him. Sango's tone was rather bitter, mentioning that she had felt the same thing about the relationship she had had with Hiten. She spoke a brief good-bye and abruptly hung up after that. She had never really talked about her past with Hiten, but I suspect (and Kagura agrees) that he had abused her. Whether is was physically or emotionally, I am just glad she found Miroku._


	3. Entry Three

Thanks to SKSunCloud for being the first reviewer!

_"...You're dangerous  
Just get it up  
The way you move so scandalous  
It's all about the two of us..."_ -** Mis-teeq, Scandalous**

Entry Three

February 6th

Dear Diary,

_I know that this is two entries in one day, but I feel that I must record this down. I had stowed you away and was about to draw myself a bath when the phone rang. It was Kikyou. How she got my phone number, I do not know. She said that she had just a few short words to say to me and for me to listen carefully. She told me to stay away from Inuyasha and that he was hers and hers alone. She had heard I looked like her, and she had glanced upon me earlier today. I guess I had been wrong to assume that she had not seen me. She then proceeded to tell me it was no wonder he had been with me. I looked too much like her. She then hung up._

_My hand was shaking when I put the phone down. The way she had said those words were positively dripping with malice. Inuyasha has still yet to return my call and I am afraid he has already chosen. I am deeply regretting those words I said. You don't know what I'm talking about don't you? The phrase that started this whole chaotic mess. Well, her return was what really started it, but I just added more fuel to the fire. "**Choose. Me or her.**" I had regretted saying it the moment those words were out of my mouth. I regretted it even more when his eyes widened, and then slackened as he took my hand and nodded._

_He had asked for time, and in the shock I was in, I nodded back. Every second I regret it even more. I know that in the end he is going to have to choose. I know it will be very very hard for him; no matter who it is he chooses. The very thought of that just makes me want to curl up under my covers and die._


	4. Entry Four

AN: I want to thank everyone who reviewed... and thank you **Miroku Girl**, for your brute honesty. I know some people do really really long entries in their diaries etc. etc. But I, who has tried many many times to keep a diary, only end up making short entries, about three pages of writing. And people just are different when they write in something they feel that is in just their own eyes right? I know I do. And besides... I don't really go around interviewing people about their diaries and such... I'm just really basing it all on my own 'experience'... and not all her entries are sad! Like this one.. (okay.. i feel like I have said too much...)

_"Gray skies are gonna clear up  
Put on a happy face  
Wipe of the clouds and cheer up  
Put on a happy face  
  
Take of the gloomy mask of tragedy  
It's not your style  
You'll look so good that you'll be glad  
That you decided to smile  
  
Pick out a pleasant outlook  
Stick out that nobel chin  
Wipe off that full-of-doubt look  
Snap on a happy grin  
  
Spread sunshine all over the place  
And just put on a happy  
Put on a happy face..."_ -**The Supremes, Put On A Happy Face**

Entry Four

February 7th

Dear Diary,

_I have good news! Sango just called me and told me that she was pregnant! I am so happy for her and Miroku! I can't wait to see him running around, shoving cigars into people's mouths, an carrying Sango around in fear that she have a miscarriage. I am so incredibly glad for them. They have been trying forever to conceive. Another wave of good news is that Kagura's coming to spend the night tonight, the reason being is that the house was infested with termites, one of Kohaku's little 'experiments' gone wrong... From what I hear, Rin is staying with her aunt Kanna. Rin absolutely **adores** that woman... but I can't see why really. Unless Kanna is completely different when she is alone with Rin... I don't get it. A hyperactive little girl like that with a morbid, quiet, and very disturbed woman... But everyone knows that Kanna spoils her rotten. If Rin weren't so good natured she would be such a spoiled brat!_

_Kohaku is being sent to Sango's place. Sango is always happy to have her godson over. Sesshoumaru seems to be working late tonight, so everything works out alright. I doubt I will have time to write tonight, so I am doing this in a hurry before Kagura arrives. I think I hear a knock..._


	5. Entry Five

AN: This will probably the longest chapter in the story...and I really don't want any reviews saying that Kagome's never like this... well, it's her friggin' diary, things are under different circumstances, and well... gah! nevermind...remember... **alternate universe**...

Entry Five

February 8th

Dear Diary,

_I have not felt this depressed since I found out that my father had accused me of abusing Souta. That was when I was fourteen. Souta and I were playing in the backyard, and he fell over onto the stone waterfall. He got a bunch of bruises on him arms and one on my cheeck. My father, when he came home that night, saw those bruises and began to rant and rave at me._

_My mother tried to correct him and tell him that Souta had tripped and fallen on the stones, but he was then accusing me of pushing Souta onto the rocks. I was so hurt. I would never do anything to hurt my baby brother! I knew enough sense to try and ignore my father's words, sensing that he really resented having a daughter._

_I went upstairs that night and was still very very depressed. I wished so bad to kill myself. But then... I would think of what I cost my family. This was by no means because I **loved **them or anythhing like that. My father had deserted me and my mom and returned every couple months. I later learned, at the age of seven, that my parents had never truly divorced, only had a temporary separation. They still slept together on occasion even though, and this was proved later that year when Souta was born. My dad lived 24/7 with us after that. I never felt any real family love or obligation towards that man. So the obligation to repay my parents the cost of raising me has kept me going for so long. That obligation has been paid to the fullest..._

_I never expected to become so successful with what I thought was a temporary job. I enver expected to live past the age of eighteen really... But last night, when I was talking to Kagura, it really hit me. Inuyasha was really going to choose._

_He was going to have to pick who he liked better. If it were me in that situation, I would have had a breakdown a long time before, and not even a diary could have helped relieve my stress._

_I feel so guilty. I know he would have had to chose sooner or later, I mean, he couldn't just keep seeing the both of us now could he?!_

_But Kagura was suprisingly encouraging to me. It was strange. I mean, everyone around me, even Sesshoumaru, says that I should leave Inuyasha. _

_But Kagura's words really just hit me in the heart. They were so truthful, and there were no sympathic looks or anything. _

_"Just stick with it. Being with Inuyasha sure as hell won't be easy. Damn, if he's at all like his brother, and they are more alike than people give them credit for, then it's going to be really tough. But... you love him. And he loves you. Love with find its way for you two. I can feel it. There might be lots and lots of obstacles - " and there she coughed and said the word 'claypot bitch'. That's a little inside joke. The first time Kagura met Kikyou, she told me she thought that that woman was made of clay! She was so **pale**... " - but it will be worth it in the end. It always is."_

_Her words are the only thing really keeping me going on now... but there's something at the back of my mind. I just can't go and kill myself now. I feel as if I have another obligation to fulfill. But I have a problem. I don't know what that is._


	6. Entry Six

AN: Just to let you know... there is a reason I update twice a day sometimes... I update the days that Kagome 'writes' in her diary... just look at the dates... It's not me in all my randomness again.

Entry Six

February 8th

Dear Diary,

_Inuyasha still hasn't called me. I don't know what to do. Should I make another call? Or would that appear too needy? There is less than a week before Valentine's Day. I'm not sure what to expect._

_There is something telling me that Valentine's day will reveal the path that our relationship shall go on. I am making a call to tell him to have his decision made by Valentine's Day. Of course - I've gotten his answering machine. I have just told him. Well, indirectly of course. I don't know if I will regret this like I regretted making him choose._

_I certainly hope not. I think this diary thing really works. I have been able to think more calmly and clearly about this situation. Tomorrow, Sango, Kagura, and I are going to shop for Kagura's Valentine night. I have already agreed to watch Rin and Kohaku. Sango, when asked if she needed anything, said Miroku had weird tastes but luckily she stopped when Kagura gave a violent cough. I'm not going to shop for anything. _

_If Inuyasha doesn't call on Valentine's Day, at least I will have Rin and Kohaku to keep me from brooding about everything. I don't want to get my hopes up and waste money in doing so._


	7. Entry Seven

AN: I just wanted to tell people that this **is an InuXKag** fic... hey... in some stories Kikyou and Inuyasha are together too... but you really don't go around asking if it's a kag/inu story right? Well, the reason this is sounding more and more like an inu/kik fic is because this is Kagome's point of view... and she's seriously doubting everything at this point...

BTW... another note on diary entries... I know people have long entries, and you guys would like it too... but i want to keep the feel of a real diary in here, so details/other's opinons/etc etc will not really be shown. after all... it's a diary. Besides... the fact that the entries aren't as long as my other stories makes me have enough energy to type out a chapter daily... be happy.

And damn you all! I feel so bad that all my chapters are short, so I'm updating two EXTRA chapters today. Feel lucky bastards...

Entry Seven

February 9th

Dear Diary,

_I had a great time shopping! I know this sounds corny, but I felt so young! Yeah. That sounds corny alright. Not young in the sense of age or thought. I just felt so free and I felt as if I left all my worries somewhere far behind. Yeah, that sounds **even** cornier, but yeah. That's the kind of feeling I only get when I'm with my best friends. It just gives me a feeling that no one will put me down for being me, will critize me, and will love me for being me. I guess that comes with the territory of the 'family love' that my father gave us._

_Kagura, who seems to have had in mind what to buy, bought a silk kimono worth $700. She told us that he (Sesshoumaru) was very into Medieval Japan. Sango started teasing Kagura about his 'fetish' and they began bickering. It wasn't a serious bickering, but more of a teasing fest. Sango compared how Sesshoumaru and Kagura act now to how they acted when they were 'courting' (and she actually used this word because that was what Sesshoumaru said he and Kagura were doing. He kept denying that they were dating and called it courting...). The ironic thing is they act the same way they did when they WERE dating._

_Well, for the record, I've had this diary for four days now. It seems as if I'm thinking more and more about the whole stupid affair with Inuyasha and Kikyou. Writing down all this really does work. I've had it with all this chaos. Re-reading over my entries has made me realize I am just tormenting myself into staying with Inuyasha._

_If he truly loved me, wouldn't he have just chosen me the moment I asked him to?_

_He has not answered my call and I'm fed up with all of this. __I'm going to his office tomorrow during my lunch break. It's going to be the first time I've seen him in two weeks. I haven't seen him since I left his office that day, telling him to choose. This time, it will be to tell him that this relationship is over. I love him as much I ever have and ever can possibly love him. But this charade is just too much and I just cannot take it anymore. I know he is suffering too, and I would just rather see him happy with her than tormenting himself with telling me that it is over. That is just the way things have to be._

**"She was beautiful and had everything and more..."**_ - Ashlee Simpson_


	8. Entry Eight

AN: Whenever I make a comment on a review someone made, I'm not trying to insult anyone! Sure... it might sound like it... everything I say sounds like an insult... ask Sin. I thank everyone who has reviewed... and just to confirm 'confirm' it... I never write other pairings for the **Inuyasha/Kagome, Miroku/Sango, and Sesshoumaru/Kagura... **(and the entries sound formal...? Because I'm typing the way I would talk... I talk formal...? ::confused::)

Entry Eight

February 10th

Dear Diary,

_It's lunch break. Yes, I brought you with me. I don't know why. I just want to re-read those words I imprinted into this little book over and over again to give me the courage to go. But oh god..._

_I don't know. My stomach has completely died on me. Where are the butterflies everyone talks about getting? Oh dear lord... I don't know if I can bring myself to do this._

_I know in my mind that it is the right thing to do, but my heart is just telling me **no**... I was told by my mother to listen to nothing but my heart..._

_...but look what kind of an asshole she ended up with..._


	9. Entry Nine

AN: I thank everyone for the reviews!!! This chapter is more of a review answering question thingie than a real chapter... don't worry. I'm updating again in like... half an hour. haha.

Okay... I think I haven't made things clear... Well I know I haven't... but Kagome isn't a teenager. She's about... in her mid twenties. Use your imaginations. Kagura and Sesshoumaru are married, and their kids are Kohaku and Rin. (Kohaku being the older one) Their ages are around the ages of them in the manga, eleven and seven. I think...

I'll work on getting more details without really telling them soon... promise! Am working on that.

**MirokuGirl13**... thank you for reviewing and thank you for your tip things... about her sudden mood swings... I had a diary once... a long long time ago, and I have already said I am really just using that as an outline. But that's really changing... see.. I figured Kagome (in the manga/anime, whatever floats your boat) couldn't always be that chippy. She got angry sometimes... mood swings is what I assumed. So there are her mood swings. And thanks for your music thing! I'll use it sometime... when it fits the 'mood'...

...and I have one last question. Anyone want anything cleared up? Yeah. That's pretty much it.

Entry Nine

February 10th

Dear Diary,

_I am so **royally** fucking **pissed**. I finally swept up the strength to walk down the block to his office building, only to find that his is on a business trip._

_In **Paris**._

_And he is accompanying one of their models. It just so happens that the model is **Kikyou.** _


	10. Entry Ten

Entry Ten

February 10th

Dear Diary,

_They are to return on February 15th. How ironic. I guess fate had had it's design for us in the beginning. _

_I don't know what to do. It's all just rushing up to me so fast. I feel as if a I have plunged into an ice-cold river and am being pulled down the river by it's current, not knowing why it has happened or what to do..._


	11. Entry Eleven

AN: Yes. I admit it. The title of one of my stories is in here... it was just such good motivation that I couldn't resist!!

Entry Eleven

February 10th

Dear Diary,

_I returned home, completely washed out, only to be surprised by Yura! She has come back! Straight from the airport, she raced over to my apartment. We laughed. We cried. We spent well over three hours chatting. I filled her in on a whole lot of what's been going on. She told me that Houjou had finally proposed to her! I'm to be her maid of honor come August. _

_When I told her about Kikyou, she just flew into a rage. It felt great to be with her again. That month long 'vacation' she took was just too long. It just seems that I can't be as depressed and mopey as I usually am whenever Yura's around. My life just feels so much better... and comfortable. Sounds weird, but true. My stress literally flies away._

_We have been best friends since grade school, when I traded her my oatmeal and raisin cookie for some Pocky. I remember that day. My mom was testing out some new recipe and Yura, who is half American, fell in love with the stuff. _

_She the person that bites back when people push me down. I'm the one that calms her down when she gets mad at someone. We're like fire and ice... it's an inside joke. One day we were being 'philosophical' in the way 15 year olds can be and we wondered how life would be like without fire. _

_I compared it to Yura. I couldn't bear to live if I didn't have her. Fire is very important and all that... and Yura then, and as she is now, is very important to me. But then, it caused __a fit of giggles and then lead to another questions... it was Yura's. How would life be like without ice?_

_She then, with a solemn face, told me how life would be like without me. Bearable, but just not the same... especially when it got too hot... with the fire and all..._

_She then told me that life without ice was like living without an opposite, without a best friend. I mean, there is a reason for the saying "opposites attract" isn't there?_

_So that's how we compare ourselves... as fire and ice..._

_So with Yura, I know things will always work out. She has been there with me through all my troubles... I can't imagine life without Yura. Well... I can't imagine my hair either... Yura just obsesses and plays with my hair..._

_And after that lengthy talk with Yura, and the rants she had, I have come to the decision that if Inuyasha does not call me to reconcile by Valentine's Day, I'll call **him** myself. _

_To break up. Oh - I better go... Yura told me she would call when she got back home!_


	12. Entry Twelve

AN: **MirokuGirl13**, that ending cracked me up. I take it for assumption that you don't like either Kikyou or Kagome... nonetheless, I like your idea. But I want to live just a little longer... so haha...

And about Yura and Kagome being friends... I don't see why not. Seriously... I **like** Yura. She's the bomb... and hey. It's an alternate universe fic... so I mean why not? If Yura and Kagome met under different circumstance... (ie she wanting to kill Kagome), then I thought they could have been great friends! And seriously...? I ran out of characters that I had thought of to use, and I don't really like those air headed friends Kagome has in 'her' time...

Entry Twelve

February 10th... or 11th?

Dear Diary,

_It's the middle of the night right now. Yura has already decided that she will stay with me all Valentine's Day. Well... not in the morning. She says she and Houjou shall have an early Valentine's Day. I'm rather afraid to ask her... she shares too much info and not enough personal space..._

_Anyway, Yura will be with me to make sure that, if Inuyasha doesn't call me back, she'll have me call himand break up. I'm not sure. I really don't want to end it like this. I have spent a **year** on that man. A wasted year._

_This whole thing reminds me of what Souta told me when he found out I was leaving behind the 'demon'... aka my bastard of a father._

_"As you lay there in despair, the thought of hope is in the air."_

_It means that even in your darkest hour, there is always a bit of hope in your heart... no matter how desparate the situation at hand is. I do still have hope, but hoping doesn't always mean that is will be true in the end._


	13. Entry Thirteen

AN: Kudos to those who can see what I mixed into this strange little fanfic of mine!!

Entry Thirteen

February 12th

Dear Diary,

_Today has been absolutely chaotic! At work, one of the security persons went ballistic and started shooting the weatherman. Everyone ducked and screamed and ran for bloody hell. It seems that Brick (the weatherman)0 is recovering in the critial wing of the hospital, but it is assumed that he will recover fine. But while he is healing, I shall take over his duties. I hope it doesn't take too friggin' long. He already has mental issues. A few more won't hurt him!!!_

_And Just Peaching Great. I get to be the weatherwoman! If Ed makes me wear those ridiculously slutty oufits to report the weather, I'm going to storm into that dinky office of his, knee him in the balls, and scream in his face._

_After all the police left, I rushed out of there because Miroku had invited me to a very fancy restaurant to celebrate Sango's pregnancy. It was great._

_Yura, Kagura, Sesshoumaur, and everyone gathered there. Kagura got sloshed and she started hitting on Houjou, much to the embarassment of him and the enjoyment of Yura. She loves the man to death, and it just cracks her up. She's not the jealous type... _

_Kagura always manages to track down the poor man everytime she gets drunk. How she does that is beyond me... maybe a radar?_

_Sesshoumaru wasn't the happiest little bunny... hell. He's never a happy little bunny. The closest he can get to a happy little bunny is probably a constipated growling puppy._

_That's hilarious. Anyway, he wasn't happy... so he threw his wife over his shoulder, gave Sango and Miroku a congrats and departed._

_I think I'm a little drunk right now too... but I wonder what would happen if **Sesshoumaru** got drunk???_

_I'm going to have to get Miroku to make that happen... I would die laughing. Hard._

_It's great to be surrounded with such good friends. I just love being with thtme, because it's when I'm by myself that I think about Inuyasha... It still hurts as much as it used to... butnow I'm rather... accustomed to it. Strange, but true._

_If anyone had told me love was this hard, I would have become a shrine maiden years ago. There are two days left..._


	14. Entry Fourteen

AN: I'm so sorry and I will probably get some angry rants about this little cliffhanger shit thing... But I'm going to San Fransisco tonight... and I don't know if I'll have the time to come up with new chapters. But that's why I posted so many friggin' ones... I'll be gone until September 2nd.

Entry Fourteen

February 13th

Dear Diary,

_All I've done today is drive to work, do work, and come straight home. My stomach is in knots. Tomorrow is my 'deadline'. I have made calls to Kagura and Sango, wishing them both a Happy Valentine's Day since they will both be too busy tomorrow. Another reason I did not want to loiter out on the streets is because everything is so **heavily** decorated for tomorrow. I just can'st stand anything right now. I'm going to go take some sleeping pills and get some rest. _

_Kohaku and Rin are being dropped off by Jaken tomorrow, and they'll be sleeping over. Yura will be arriving around noon. I'm in for a looong day tomorrow. Rin has the hyperactivity of a squirrel on a sugar high (not that I know what that's like...) and Kohaku is just too curious about everything. But they are really endearing..._

_And Yura... sometimes she just loses it and acts like Rin's age..._

_...great. Now I'm doubting about my choice to let Yura stay for the day. _


	15. Entry Fifteen

AN: Back from San Fran. Friends over all day so no time to post. Here ya go!!

February 14th

Entry Fifteen

Dear Diary,

_Hello Diary. It's eleven thirty and Rin and Kohaku are asleep in my room. Yura left a few minutes ago. I have already made a call to Inuyasha. It tells him that I am breaking up with him. I'm still holding out for his call. I shall wait until the clock strikes midnight._

_Earlier today, Yura had given the mistake to give Rin some fairie dust. Rin was just yammering all over the place for a few hours until I put in **The Lion King**. Kohaku was very calm the whole day. When I asked him what was wrong, he told me he knew what the birds and bees were._

_It was rather cute. The facial expression that he had... oh bad images! ew! ew! I don't want to think about that!!! EWWWWW!! Anyway, it's now eleven thirty eight._


	16. Entry Sixteen

February 15th

Entry Sixteen

Dear Diary,

_It is now 12:35. Maybe it isn't Valentine's Day yet in Paris? That is probably why he hasn't called me yet. _


	17. Entry Seventeen

February Fifteenth

Entry Seventeen

Dear Diary,

_Maybe he is on his airplane and the time changes are so confused he can't tell what day it is..._


	18. Entry Eighteen

AN: That's all you're getting for today. Yes short, but I'm working on it. I can't find the book I wrote in!! ::panic panic::

February 15th

Entry Eighteen

Dear Diary,

_I should stop tricking myself. He's not calling. We are over. Kikyou won. I just hope I don't have to see them._

_Oh no. Aren't they coming back today?! I dunno... maybe I should take a vacation...? Sesshoumaru should be able to help in that... Kagura too maybe._


	19. Entry Nineteen

AN: Does no one know what fairie dust is?!?! It's not pixie sticks.. well, it's simliar, but it's different. Okay... so they are almost alike... ::twitch:: But it's like Raisinets and chocolate covered raisins!! THERE IS A DIFFERENCE!!!!!!!! [anyway, I haven't gotten any sleep sine Friday so I'll only be posting one chapter today... sorry... I'll be on the computer the whole day tomorrow... well, I PLAN to...] Oh and a little note about grammar... I don't check it... isn't it supposed to be more relaxed? So... shouldn't there be mistakes?? 0.o Well, I'll keep 'em anyways...

February 15th

Entry Nineteen

Dear Diary,

_I've got a vacation. Weird really, I just asked Ed and he gave me a whole week off... Sesshoumaru got me a plane ride to California. I'll be just relaxing there for a week, sightseeing, work on a tan at the beach... and Kagura told me to take pictures. Lots and lots of pictures of guys on the beach._

_Sesshoumaru was out of earshot, duh... but anyway I will. I think she's really serious... but it's Kagura. I don't know what to do with the five one time use cameras she gave me... I forgot the name... it rhymes with zodiac or something... _

_The plane in four hours. I've packed my bags and am all set. Yura is coming to send me off after taking Kohaku and Rin back to Sess's and Kagura's house. I don't know if I'm nervous or something to think about something like this at the moment, but I just realized that Sesshoumaru's stupid name is too friggin' long!!!!! I get hand cramps just writing his name a few times in a row... gah!!!_

_I'm going to go see the difference in time zones now... _

_PS... I think I am freaked out by the whole thing. I haven't left Japan in thirteen years!!!! Gah!! Sesshoumaru Sesshoumaru Sesshoumaru Sesshoumaru Sesshoumaru Sesshoumaru... ah. Goodies. My hand is cramping up too much now... can't write anymore..._


	20. Entry Twenty

AN: Wow. It's been a long time. I started this fic last summer and I'm continuing it this summer. o.o i feel stupid. okay - i shall continue updating this daily now. hahaha.. fyi: there really is a restaurant in hollywood called garden of eden. this little authoress did her research! hehehe...

* * *

February 20th 

Entry Twenty

Dear Diary,

_I haven't been writing in here at all. Guess there was no need really… California is absolutely amazing! It's just like the movies… 24/7 sun and the weather is gorgeous… In two days time I'll have to leave. I will be sad – and I still need to develop those cameras Kagura gave me._

_The first day I got here I got a slight sunburn but now that I know just how much sunscreen I need, I'm fine. I believe I am twice as dark as I was when I got here but that's alright! The more changes in me the better. Hell, if I can't change what's going on around me I might as well be able to change myself._

_Maybe I should consider getting highlights before I leave… but I've decided something._

_When I get back home the first thing I'm going to do is buy a dog. The streets here are littered with the adorable things and I just suddenly got the urge to own one! Tonight Iwas invited to goto dine at Garden of Eden with one of Sesshoumaru's friends here._

_I have to remember his name... eck eck eck... oh well. Until then diary!_


	21. Entry TwentyOne

FYI: she's kinda drunk.

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February 20th

Entry Twenty-One

Dear Diary,

_oh wow... tonight was extravagant the restaurant was gorgeous, the food was gorgeous, and my escort was gorgeous!i don't know... it's just this cali lifestylethats been sucking me in all into this weeki guess..._

_one thing Im feeling guilt for cheting on inuyasha, even though I know we're not together anymore... another thing is i'm wasted out of my mind for half the part of tonight and I have no idea what im writting about anmore..._

_i think that Houjou was just so hott in his little spiffy suit... _


	22. Entry TwentyTwo

AN: Sorry... was going through this and realized I had made a boo boo. XD mm how can Kagome be going out with Houjou if he's engaged to Yura?

mm hm exactly. Changed it

* * *

February 22nd

Entry Twenty-Two

Dear Diary,

_I am in such a guilt trip right now... the past couple of days I've been going out withJinenji to see movies, blah blah blah, blah blah blah and everything. He even tried to kiss me! I feel like I'm leading him on or something..._

_I know what Kagura would tell me if she were here... I can just HEAR her telling me "He cheated on you. Cheat back! CHEAT BACK!"_

_Psh. And I can see the waves crashing behind her while she cackles maliciously. My airplane leaves tonight to go home._

_I don't know if I want to..._


	23. Entry TwentyThree

February 22nd/23rd?

Entry Twenty-Three

Dear Diary,

_Waiting for the plane to come... and I realized I forgot something back in my hotel room..._

_...Kagura's developed pictures..._

_I suppose she'll want me to reimburse her... I'm going to miss California..._

_I wonder if I got tanner?_


End file.
